The Other From Within

How long does it take to find a person? Well you could say: "Well duh, people are everywhere! Just go down to the supermarket and you'll see loads!" Yes, you may find someone, or many people. You may find an old man with a cane, or a woman with three children. You may see an outgoing individual who says "Hello!" to you.

You found these people, but have you really found 'them'? We have mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, friends, spouses, children and the list goes on. Who are these people?

The interior of one's self is something that is hidden to all but one person, you. Some would even say they don't know themselves. We all have secrets, mystery, hidden potential and hidden thoughts. Can one truly know another?

Philosophically, a person's "Other" is the perceived individual by a third source. You may think of the outgoing man or women who said "Hello!" to you in the grocery store is a great person, the only built perception of them is what had just happened, and what you had just felt. A mini-judgment, if you will.

The reality is, is that this person may be the most insecure individual inside. They may something entirely different than what you thought. This isn't something new, it happens all the time, and your thoughts that moment were of positive, outgoing, and an overall nice person.

When you apply this to our current ties and relationships, however, it becomes something very intriguing. How will you ever know a person entirely? I, personally, have found moments with people I have known for years where I exclaim "I didn't know that about you!" or even being negatively surprised at a person, seeing a side of them I never had known existed.

Its unbelievable to me how a couple could get married having known each-other for a month or two. Yes, it could be seen as an 'adventure', getting to know someone, but is it really worth risking such a commitment on a basis so shallow? It really goes to show you that we really know nothing about the majority of people we know.

Long-term communication and delving into another's mind, is something of huge importance when considering something similar to a long-term relationship, even considering living with a friend, or making a partnership commitment.

Can we really find a person, find a true person, find who a person truly is. I believe we can.

Common goals drive similar people together, like-thoughts, like-actions, like-motives. Like-people tend to be productive and lasting. The initial attraction, however, is opposite.

Think of it this way, into the very basis of what we are created from, the very basis of life and matter. Into a molecule we find an atom, into an atom we find Baryons, the most common of which are proton and neutrons, and the composite which are made of Quarks.

One interesting thing about the smallest particle of matter, and Hadrons in general, is that they have a characteristic called spin.

Basically spin determines the attraction between other quarks, binding them. Quarks that have an opposite spin integer magnetically are attracted.

This can be applied to humans and numerous other things as well, say you 'find' in person that they are selfless, and you are a more selfish person, or one person is more organized and the other is more sporadic.

These things are opposites, and in the long run, the combination of which will not only help you learn about yourself, but also create an equilibrium.

I'm sure the majority of people have heard of the term "opposites attract" I believe this is true in many ways, but I also think that the opposites with the same goals for life will work out substantially better.

If you are entirely opposite in nature, in interests, personality, and goals; there is a very good chance that the relationship will fail out of contention and stubborn individuals.

A rare thing, to find your balancing quark, that person that operates on the the same life frequency as you, but has those things that you need yourself to be whole.

I hope to all that the person is found, and that person is cherished.

So can you find a person? Again I ask, and the answer seems to echo: You must.

For the sake of stability and true commitment in your life. You can't dictate your ties based on if they like to drink and party like you do, or they are good looking, or they are 'fun'. These are superficiality.

We must all find that person hat balances us, the person that creates us.

These particles of life spin freely in their own unique direction, incomplete, magnetized in their own way, searching for that other that makes them whole, makes them complete.

Find that person. Don't stop your search until you do, because it is the basis of life.